Dear Katherine

Dear Katherine,

This is it. Only a week or so until we meet you. I have so many thoughts that I don’t know where to begin, but here goes.

Right now, I’m stir crazy. I want so desperately to meet you and officially begin this journey of motherhood, but I also know it’s the last time things will be exactly as they are right now. We’re in the last few days/weeks of it just being your daddy and me. The last time the house will be this quiet and possibly this clean. The last time your room will be vacant. The last time I’ll be able to take naps guilt-free and only worry about myself. The last time I’ll be able to mindlessly mess with my phone while watching tv shows.

I know, those things sound kind of nice. But honestly, I’m ready for what’s next. I’m ready to see your face. I’m ready to learn your personality. I’m ready to hold you in my arms. I’m ready for you to meet our family and friends. I’m ready to see the way your daddy’s face will shine as he sees you for the first time. I’m ready to see  the way your cousins will welcome you to the mix. I’m ready to see how your grandparents’ faces will light up as they cradle you in their arms, especially your Papa Hladik. For as tough as he is, he always melts when holding babies. 

There’s a lot of things I’m going to miss, and a lot of things I’m ready for, but I’m honestly scared, too. I’m scared of labor. I’m scared of how I’ll recover from labor. I’m scared that I won’t know what to do. I’m scared that I won’t be enough. I’m scared that I can’t do everything I’ll have to do. I’m scared of something bad happening to you. I’m scared of what changes will come.

I obviously have a lot of emotions, but what pulls me through is you. I’ve prayed about this moment for so long. I’m about to begin a new vocation of motherhood, and I couldn’t be happier. God will give me the strength to conquer everything to come. Your daddy will be by my side the whole way through. We can do this. 

I love you more than words, sweet baby girl. We can’t wait to meet you!

With all of my love,

Momma